I take care of all kinds of people at work. This week I had all ages from 4 days to 98 years old. The 4 day old came on the last day of my 7 day stretch, the 98 year old came on my first. And actually, these were my two favorite patients i had all week. I took care of several nice people, some slightly off people, some majorly off people and at least one real ahole (I've taken care of the real ahole before. If i never had to care for another person with Borderline Personality disorder, I'd be the happiest girl in the world.) Anyway, I took care of a 95 year old gent that had fallen somewhere else in the hospital and came down to the ER as indicated by the Risk Management policy. The patient was very very polite, softly spoken, and generally pleasant. His son, on the other hand, was not. He was intensely intense. He didn't waste a minute letting me know that risk management was already involved in the incident. (Now, this had nothing to do with me, or my department, other than we were checking the patient out just to be safe. Also, the patient isn't going to be billed at all since it was allegedly the hospital's fault.) After my patient returned from radiology the son asked how long it would be until the results were posted. Radiology films/images are always red "STAT" and depending on the study, results take about 30 minutes. Before i could complete the sentence, the Son said "Well, if it's not done quickly, I'll be calling my attorney." I didn't respond to that because I knew doing so would further inflame the man. (Secretly, I patted myself on the back for keeping my mouth shut). Eventually everything came back and nothing new was wrong, yet for service recovery purposes, the patient was admitted to the hospital near the family member he was visiting when he took the fall.
In all this i began to think why the Son and the patient were so different. I had talked at length with my patient about his life, what he did before retiring, what his hobbies are, how long he'd been married. Such a soft affect. A pleasant man. He reminded me of my grandpa (but a lot of nice old men do). I wondered how such a graceful man could have such an intense son that uses bullying and intimidation in unnecessary situations. Where did the Son learn to act like this. My question is: Does time soften us? For those that are hardened, difficult people, does time soften and ease the personality back to something that is desirable and attractive. I'd like to think so (and i hope that i will). I wonder if the Son learned his callousness from his dad. If my patient (dad) was really an aggressive person, I'm thankful that his heart has time to rest and be warm. If my patient has always been this way, then maybe the Son is just another ahole. Sometimes the simplest explanation is really the easiest one.
The week is over for me and i begin my 7 day stretch of un-work. It will be a week of solitude mostly.....but that's the story of my life- both by chance and purpose.
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